i want you to like this

From a Messenger conversation today:

"

Also, I was thinking: I think people rarely say something like "I want you to like this thing that I show you".

And I have the feeling that sometimes people do have that feeling, and do not express it.

This indicates to me a blockage or diversion of the feeling.

I think that the internal dialogue that happens when blocking this feeling is something like:

"I want her to like this thing that I showed her. But I cannot make her like it. Also, liking is not a voluntary thing. Even she cannot like it just because she wills it. It's outside her power.

Then why I would I say it? She can do nothing with the information, she will likely feel pressured into liking this thing, and may feel guilty because she cannot do anything about it. And for myself, I will present a need I have that depends on her, thereby displaying something of a weakness, a dependency in me, and I don't want her to know that, because that feels shameful."

Regardless of the strategizing, I intuit that being able to express fully is valuable.

A core part of this value, I believe, is the understanding of oneself one must have before one is able to express fully and clearly.

"