Crossroads

With my scholarships rejected and free to make my own decisions, these past weeks I've been struggling to choose a path. I have so many options in front of me - which one do I really wish to do?

1. Abacus practice: More of a commitment to someone else than my real wish... still keeps me anchored here in Guatemala... do I really want to keep on doing this? I'm starting to think I'm doing it more for Kira than for myself.
2. Travel: My dream adventure. Dream Life. Going to unknown places, taking jobs like bartender and window-washer, meeting new people, new cultures, learning new languages, eventually becoming a true global citizen... cool, huh? The COOLEST! Of course, I'd probably have to suspend any kind of stable job related to my career. But isn't Life for the taking? To enjoy every single moment, starting NOW? I feel like I'm just one step away from taking this option. Very, very tempting.
3. Arts, linguistics & gymnastics: I'd LOVE to sing like Pavarotti, play the piano like Mozart, paint like Picasso, write like J.K. Rowling, play a violin virtuoso, speak, read, write, and understand 15 different languages fluently, and run and jump like David Belle. Can I do it all? I'm sure I can. Am I willing to let my life slip by while I master each of these wonderful talents? I don't know.
4. Stable, prosperous, routinary life: Probably my worst fear. 8-5 jobs are OUT OF THE QUESTION. It may sound awful or ungrateful, but I think I'd rather travel and beg than be trapped inside such a gray life. I could POSSIBLY take a temporary 1-3 month job to earn enough money for a project or something, but basing my life on a job is NOT my idea of a decent Life.
   
5. Inner, spiritual search: I'm sure this can be combined with any of the previous options, but I'm afraid I don't have the proper discipline of mind to permanently follow two goals at a time. "He who chases two rabbits catches neither". Maybe Travel is the most compatible option to follow together with this one. Hmmm, I'm starting to discern a good option here...
   
6. Personal inventions: I believe to be inventive. I like to imagine and design new stuff all the time - stuff that would probably make our lives much easier. Now, developing inventions takes time and resources. Probably 24/7 to make them right. Probably the second-best option after Travel, I'm already thinking on people to contact to create these inventions with.
7. Scholarships: Even with 5 scholarship rejections so far this year, I believe I have good chances to get a Ph.D. scholarship somewhere. A contact at UCF has even told me that I have a GUARANTEED CS Ph.D. offer at UCF if I were to apply. Now, is that what I REALLY want? ANOTHER 4-6 years of STUDYING? Hmmmm... I don't think so. The period of sacrifices in my Life is temporarily suspended - I'm cashing in rewards now!
   

So... I believe these to be my current options. I want to choose quickly. Why don't I? Abacus? Is that the only reason? Ugh. I'm going to have a serious talk with Kira soon. :S I hope we can come to a mutually beneficial arrangement.