Cynicism

Cynicism is a quality
often attributed with destructive criticism
attack from a distance
disdain for its target
more a weapon or a method
than a quality

the key feature I see in it
is that of emotional repulsion
rejection
it fears emotional closeness
for once involved emotionally
the distance to the target collapses
and one touches what is scorned
and one is cynical no more.

tis worthy to consider
that such emotional rejection
is itself emotionally biased
and by repelling what it fears
it fails its own objective.

such disdain prevents one from applying potency
in the targeted field
like a force field it denies one access
by one's own hand.

then even when one realizes
there is value in what is disdained
dissolving the force field is not always easy
doing so carries the weight of repentance
and removing it often brings out shame
of having once disdainfully dismissed
what one now desires to explore.

Island Hopper

Island-hopper have I been

hopping from island to island

trading one island for another

trading one certainty for another

my body tight on the grasping

amidst the universal carousel

because it feels oh so safe

so cozy

to keep dry and to stay dry

and because it looks like so many others

struggle to swim lest they drown.

avoidant of swimming

afraid of the struggle

I struggle to keep my feet dry.

and dare not learn to swim.

until now.

I wish no more to grapple

from one happenstance rock to the next

the ocean is vast and therein lies

the freedom my soul yearns to taste.

only swimming

can one learn to swim.