coffee this morning
at a cafe I had never entered
on a street I often walk
time with calm, no fuss
i walk back, unpacking food
i feel a sudden pull
work must be done. get to it
the body jerks small, agitated
i pause to feel what is
ahh, my rhythm is stronger
faster, quicker, it needs to do
something alerts us, so
something must be done
i see the half-stored groceries
strewn on the kitchen counter
no, time for work is not yet here
i feel my chest beats, loud.
my body feels alert
and rises energy
to survive, to do what is necessary
but there is no necessary now
coffee jerks my body, feels an agitated energy spike.
it means no intent. it comes not from will
but from physical vibrations.
interpret, then, is what i do.
emotion feels body
hotter, quicker, shaky,
it recognizes it. it is fear.
the thoughts now notice.
there is fear here
that was not here before.
if fear is here, there must be
something missing, something wrong
There's nothing different happening. Maybe... did I forget something? Am I late for something?
what's the next thing on my list?
Ah, work! Work yes, Is it too late already?
That is something that is missing
the work done for today
so I will do the work
and this is how
I'll take care of what's wrong.
thinks mind.
and pulls my body's bridle workward.
this was how my feelings were
with my coffee today
I do not need to do things.
I perceive what my senses bring me
I interpret the signals as fears
or joys, griefs
and armed with my interpreted emotions
my mind devises a plan to
keep us safe and bring us well.
we interpret
we choose.
i choose.
pay presence to what we sense
what we think
what we feel
then we can t-r-a-c-e the path, f-e-e-l
the processees within us
thhat we may know
why and how
you cry
you laugh
you hurt
you love
you lack
you thrive
you rage
you fear
you fall
