Thursday, November 29, 2007

Choices

Have you ever been confronted with two choices, one which you claim as your ideal, and another tempting you, one which lures you into thinking that it is only a longer, more comfortable path to your ideal, but which you fear that will trap you in the very world that you avoid, maybe even for the rest of your life?

What to do when your soul is set upon a path so strongly, and then another option comes by - a stable, standard, secure path, which everyone around you recommends? Must you ignore all past knowledge and follow only your heart? Isn't that what we came to this Life for? I live life to experience... to try... to LIVE... as I DECIDE.

"Here is life, an experiment to a great extent untried by me..."

And if I follow advice all the time, how can I truly experience Life? How can I know what Life is REALLY about when I'm led only along the path everyone travels? NO. My heart, my soul, my true desire MUST be my guide!!!!!

"Un camino lo hacen los pies!"

Sunday, November 25, 2007

Relativity

The following impression struck me today: our opinion is important. Whatever we want to express, we should. Not because it's good. Not because it's right. Simply because it's our own. And no other opinion matters as much as one's own.

In my experience, I don't bring out my opinion very much. I either prize it too much for the "rest of the world", or I fear it might seem wrong in their eyes. Either way, I tend not to say ANYTHING until I am certain it will cause the effect I am hoping for - either approval, admiration, or (mostly) simply curious attention. But I just thought about it... and that's just a sick repression for my thoughts and feelings. I shouldn't care if they're "right". What is "right", anyway? On most levels, I believe "right" is simply the majority's opinion. So why should I repress my opinion simply because it's possible that I will not fit in with the majority? That's just dumb. I've been acting dumbly... for... YEARS. YEARS wasted. Silencing my personal, could-be-rejected-by-the-majority thoughts just because I'm so afraid to face a confrontation of opinion. I mean, opinions are personal, but every once in a while (or more like SEVERAL onces in a while), clashing opinions tend to escalate the confrontation to more physical levels. But I think I could handle that sort of thing.

So I've decided to let my feelings and thoughts flow freely towards my tongue and the surrounding air. Not all the time, of course - a minimal social protocol is required for survival these days. But the world will be hearing much more of me from now on, that's what I intend. Who knows... maybe I'll even vote for the next elections!

Freestyle writing example

Under a cool November sky, sitting on a wall (and freaking out the neighbors too), it occurred to me to write the following:

About Communication and Technology

Not communication technology. Everyone knows tons about that, so why say more? I'm thinking of these two separate concepts, and their effect on one another. What do I mean by it?

Well, figure this. Ten years ago, cellphones were still sort of a luxury. Yeah, remember those times? These days, I'm driving to the supermarket, and I think of my mom. So I think "hmmm, I haven't talked to her since Sunday, maybe I should give her a call". So I fumble into my pocket, squeeze my cellphone out my jeans while sitting down, and speed dial 8. Or even better, I just go "MOM" and the thing starts saying beeeeeeeep-------------- beeeeeeeeeep------------.

Took me maybe 10, 15 seconds to do the whole thing. And then 20 minutes waiting for her to stop nagging about my never calling her. But before, life was hard. We COULDN'T phone and drive. It was awful. You used to see people car-wrecked on the side of the road, WALKING entire blocks just to find a crappy payphone. Oh, and if you forgot the change, you're screwed. We still used to carry coins, how lousy was that?

Technology lets us talk to everyone, all the time now. But why would we want to do that? What's the point of talking to Tsing Hua down there in Saigon, when I can easily hook up with Easy Jenny down at the local bar? Have you seen those people flirting with Asian people on the net? (native Asians I mean...) What are they thinking? But people aren't really famous for their thinking. They're pretty stupid, actually. Yeah, I'm talking about you. You too, yes! We're stupid, admit it! At least I do.

What I'm trying to say is that we don't NEED technology. We don't need it. Cavemen, our grand-grand-grand-grand-grand-grand-grand and add two thousand grands more, grand-grand-GRAND father was a caveman. He didn't have IM, but he hooked up! He didn't even have to call her, or buy her chocolates or all that crap. Yeah, people back then were straight-on. Hard-core. You remember, right? Yeah, the good old days...

We've forgotten what communicating is really for. They knew back then, and now we don't. Really. Now only the little cellphones and computers know about it, but we don't. What is it for? I can't tell you. No, I can't. We forgot, remember? We forgot ALL about it. But if people 40,000 years ago made it through without cellphones or online dating, I believe so can we.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Wing Sprouter

My life is undergoing significant transitions these days, and I believe that it will only undergo more of these in the next few days/weeks/months. I don't feel like writing every single detail like I sometimes do...

Still, I have this nagging feeling that I should blog. For some reason...

On grounds of celebrating Marcelo Garza's visit to Guatemala, Wicho invited some people over to his "summer home" in Escuintla to chill out overnight. Though I knew I should practice abacus, I went. And I met Renato (Wicho's cousin) and Monica (Wicho's family friend), the complement of our five-member party.

And, as is usual with overnight chilling-out sessions, beer was served during the day, margaritas were brought out at sunset, and then vodka, rum, and other exotic drinks flowed throughout the night... In the alcoholic sense, I played hard-to-get, as always, and thus managed all night to keep myself just sober enough to remember everything and (almost) not to do anything stupid. To describe the eccentricities released by the liquor effect would be hardly worth the effort. Instead, I'd like to focus my description on Monica.

It's possible that I may simply be subconsciously needy, but maybe then external observers can find faults in my logic. As far as I am concerned right now, my meeting her was a sign of some sort. OK, let's see. What are the chances of my meeting someone who 1) is interested in astrology (the chinese horoscope, the Greek zodiac, AND the mayan 20-day cycle), just as I am?, 2) maps to the same zodiac sign (Pisces) as I do?, 3) likes and collects candles just as I like them and use them up?, 4) loves Koi FISH, the figures represented by a pair of floating CANDLES I bought a few months ago to try to show my "love" for another Pisces girl? (too bad I just used them up about a week ago...), 5) likes all things Japanese, the culture to which the abacus whose exercises I practice belongs and which will be represented in the nearby abacus championship to which I invited her and she agreed to go?, and 6) (perhaps the most astounding one) actually enjoyed my company and conversation and could spend long spans of time talking to me almost uninterruptedly?

I really don't know what this could mean. But it must mean SOMETHING. It's too much focused in a single person. We really hit it off. I know my plan is to leave Guatemala in the near future, but I'm not discarding any possibilities. TODO ES POSIBLE. At least that much I know. Now I gotta write her and find out what all my fuss is about.

Aside from this, The Tenth Annual Guatemalan Abacus Arithmetical Calculation Championship will take place in December 8th, 2007, and I'm one of its proud participants. :D I plan to practice enough so I can obtain First Place.

Marcelo's coming to Guatemala allowed me to meet some other people too. On Tuesday, I met (re-met, actually) a girl (let's call her G1) who Wicho describes as EXTREMELY MOODY TO THE POINT OF IRRITATION, but who, through my own observations, I believe to be very hyperactive and fun to be around with. I didn't get to know her well enough, so I can't really elaborate much. I also met another girl (let's call her G2), G1's friend, who I seem to share a couple of interests with too. Most prominent of these similarities is our love for trance music. She's a bit hyperactive herself, but she LOVES Infected Mushroom, she's gone to some of the same trance concerts I've been to this year, and now I'm sending her some of my fav trance MP3s on my list. No reply yet, but it's early. G2 ALSO cuts her own hair ;) And we heartily agreed on the solid, irrefutable fact that WE ROCK! XD

Oh yes, and how could I forget?? On account of Thanksgiving Day, Miguel Angel Toralla, my dad's current LA-resident cousin came to visit Guatemala, and had dinner with us in Restaurante Katok in Z.9. Also invited to the dinner were Elisa, Manfredo, Heidi, and their kids, all of whom arrived. It was actually pretty fun! Also at the dinner table were Miguel Angel's girlfriend (a near-50 lady who I also really enjoyed talking to), Miguel Angel's son Ibrahim, Ibrahim's wife Carolina, and their son Pablo. So there were 11 people at the table, and we ordered without any money-guilt or awkward discrepancies. The food was great, and the company was excellent. As fate would have it, Friday night is Karaoke night at Katok restaurant, and so we even ended up singing several songs each! (which marked ANOTHER quaint "God-iality", as Mimi calls it: http://www.listen-project.de/garfield/index.php?strip=1195805996. Yeah, same day, November 23rd. I actually saw the comic before, but didn't notice the "God-iality" until after coming back home! Oh yeah, and it's Sai Baba's birthday too.) And Elisa said I sing "bonito". I guess that's a really good step in the process of my removing the trauma of her calling my singing "horrible!! horrible!! horrible!!" almost 10 years ago. Maybe now I'll become more comfortable singing and soon become a prodigious, omnipitched, powerful, charismatic, heart-reaching, applause-raiser singer. Or an actor... or maybe a rock band singer? I think that'd be cool!

I think this is enough information for now. I'll post pics here as soon as I get them. Bye!

P.S: Almost forgot! The following is one of the most wonderful, significant, TRUTHFUL poems I've EVER read: http://www.elfination.com/?p=246. I hope I'm not breaking any copyright laws by doing this. :P Is this link OK with you, Ms. Elf? (In case you ever read this...)

P.P.S: The REASON my blog is called Wing Sprouter is because that's what my life is about right now. I'm sprouting wings. No elaboration of ideas here. It's also my current MSN nickname. (Typical net-junkie kind of comment, huh?)

Monday, November 19, 2007

Another milestone

Haven't blogged anything since like 39 days. I'll do one just to keep track, not really in the mood to elaborate:
  • Cut my hair on monday. I did. Yes, me. Looks short now.
  • Marcelo Garza came back from the US today afternoon. Had lunch with him today.
  • Abacus championship coming up, Dec 8th. Want to win.
  • Marcos told me to write an earthquake article for his site (www.explicame.org). I will soon.
  • Had a Skype interview with Ph.D Michael Georgiopoulos from UCF on Friday afternoon. Went fairly well.
  • SLT broke up with me yesterday. In a good way.
  • Andres repaid me 2/9ths of his debt. Promised to pay another 6/9ths this very month.
  • Used up the two little floating fish-shaped candles from Seattle. Didn't last much.
  • Plan to buy Marcelo G's $350 Toshiba laptop tomorrow, or at least this week. Not for me - for an office.
  • Went into a depressive fit last week. I'm all right now.
  • Scarleth got her cellphone stolen last week. I got her a VK i230 two days later. Now it's giving ugly MicroSD format problems.
  • Plan to leave Guatemala and go to Austin just after Dec 8th. Gotta buy the tickets soon.
  • Richard got a new Argentinian gf, Nel. She's pretty & fun. Good for both of them.
Yeah, that's all for now, I guess. Night.